Checking In - September!

What an interesting month it's been! (Such a useful word, "Interesting.")I've had the opportunity to learn a lot about "over-goaling" this month and I'm actually spending a few days re-assessing. Far from being a sign of failure, I've learned this year that those times are crucial to success. I took on too many goals and put too much pressure on myself to excel at all of them all the time, and it's okay to acknowledge that and correct it. Forward motion is progress and sometimes that forward motion is pitching a fit and declaring that there's just no way that all of this can get done right now and, if fact, declaring Bill the Cat to be my spirit animal!! (Pant, pant, sigh, gasp.)

True.

But where's that leave me?

Well, the "good books" and "good movies" challenges are back-burnered right now. With work on the Babylon 5 book heating up already, I found myself overwhelmed and teary at the prospect of doing those things to mark a title off an arbitrary list. I'll get to them, but right now isn't the season for that. I've seen plenty of movies and read plenty of books, but not the ones on "the list" and that's just dandy.

Zone cleaning is sort of in the same boat - it's not a struggle to keep up with my morning and evening routines, but much of anything beyond that is proving to be monumental. I keep the book with the zones out and I read my daily challenge each day and sometimes it gets done and sometimes something else gets done. You know what? The house is still standing and remains in better order than it used to be.

The budgeting challenge hits full-force this month. As I wrote over Labor Day weekend, we had car repair bills that turned into "we can't resurrect her this time," which meant a certain amount of yike! We're mobile again and just fine, but those were not expenses were were prepared for. It's going to be a tough end of the year on that score, no doubt about it, but it'll all work out and hey - we're doing all of this so that soon (on the cosmic scale, anyway), money won't be the issue that it is now. Delayed gratification. Can't say as I like it too much.

Now to report of the 5K challenge, which I've folded into the first-stage-of-wrapping-up "You Gonna Finish That?" Challenge. This was designed to make me hard-core accountable for a number of habits, including diet, exercise, and self-care. (Remember what I said about too many goals?) I used SparkPeople as my diet and exercise tracker which I liked since it had exercise videos and recipes that linked directly to the tracker. I don't like tracking, although I'll admit it's useful to see patterns (I eat too many carbs, for example. Mostly "good" carbs, like whole grains and the carbs found in fruit, but still - that was eye-opening). I made sacrifices in terms of sweets, made sure to drink at least two liters of water per day (yep, I know where every bathroom is throughout my college campus), aimed for hard exercise at least three times a week, and have tried to get more sleep. 

Right at a month in, I can report that, while I still don't like tracking, knowing that I have to do it has made it easier to say "no" to some bad choices. While I'm trying to not give the scale too much authority (I still stink at that, by the way), I'm down four pounds. I've also logged 13 run/walk workouts this month for a total of 31-and-a-touch miles, with 22 of those miles being at a jobble or better. For someone who was staggering around a church parking lot seven months ago, that ain't too shabby! So I'm going to keep this challenge going another month and let's see what we see.

What I really want to add in now is more attention spent on taking better care of me - teaching is not a job that lends itself to being left at the office and researching and writing a book isn't exactly a side job, so my twin goals here are to (a) make the office more pleasant and (b) not be so hard on myself with deadlines that I set and that I know to be ridiculous. I had a small writing project that nearly drove me around the bend that I should have been able to handle with ease, but when added to the several other regular gigs I've got going on (which includes two blogs, a weekly movie show that involves watching and research before the cameras begin rolling, and a regular column over at the pop culture site BiffBamPop), I was perilously close to the non-whimsical version of "crazy." So I reached the conclusion that normal people would've gotten to a long time ago and I'm not taking on more work during this time. Let me keep working on spinning the plates I've already got up on sticks!

Onward!

Moving Into Fall!

As in, actually "moving" into fall - I had my first actual timed 5K earlier this month and I just wanted to do my best. It was a challenging course and remember - my 5K back in April was that super-fun Color Run which was untimed. I was nervous. I'm not exactly sure why - I knew I could finish the course - even if I had to walk it, I'd finish it - but I wanted to do well. Ensley came out to cheer me on, as did a few other friends and I met some friends at the race. I just wanted to not be all the way at the tail end. I had a goal - finish in 40 minutes, which I thought was pretty realistic, given the times I'd been clocking on my shorter morning runs and the number of big ol, honking hills on the course.

Final time? 35:50. (And the crowd goes wild!)

Seriously. That's an average of 11:33 a mile for 3.1 miles. Oh, to many experienced runners, it's a nothing sort of time, but I'm not them and I was thrilled to the gills at that. Even won a third place medal for my age group. (I won't tell you how many people were in my age group, but yeah, it was three.) So, woo-hoo, me! And yes, I've already signed up for my next one, at which I might be chased by banjo players. Such is life in my hometown.

Due to starting on the next book project - go here to read about that - my book and movie challenges are being ignored right now. I hope to get back to them, but to everything there is a season, and right now, 'tis the season to watch and notate.

On the "You Gonna Finish That?" Challenge - I've done very well for three weeks. We took Sunday as an "off" day (my first in that time) and I ate joyously, which meant I totally overloaded on carbs and sweets, so the scale was not my friend after that. Oh, well - I'm starting to see these things differently. I'm doing what I'm supposed to do far more often than I'm not and - over time - that'll matter. It also doesn't help that I overdid it with some yard work over the weekend and haven't run since then. 'Sfunny - I actually miss not running, but I was far too sore to do that to myself. It's better to take a few days off than to stubbornly injure myself and need to take a much longer time off!

So more good than bad to report. I'll check back in at the end of the month. Today's the first day of fall and Ma Nature wasn't fooling around with the change of seasons today. Personally, I love fall - the crisp air, the colors - but it was a bit of a sudden change!

Ten Month Check In!

October's been a mixed bag.  The good habits I've been working all year to integrate into my everyday life - regular exercise, drinking lots of water, eating healthier food, staying on top of housework, and regularly taking time for small indulgences for myself - all of those got left by the side of one road or another this month.  In a way, it was depressing to see how quickly the wilderness crept back in to my little clearing.

But it's not all been gloom despair and agony on me. So let's look at what's been going on and formulate a plan for November, ummkay?

Different months are made for different things.  October was the month made for writing.  The month started with the annual regional popular culture conference, which was held in the graceful and somewhat quirky city of Savannah this year.  Last time I was there, I was strapped into a walking boot due to an Achilles' tendon injury, so I didn't see too much - and FryDaddy and I made up for that this go-round!  Our papers were well-received, we both learned some new things and we met some very nice new scholar-friends.  So, an all-around success.  For this trip, we had the best of intentions and (yay for us) we stayed within a rather strict budget (didn't go Tasmanian Devil at the deeply discounted book tables) and we walked a lot, but no - we didn't eat the way we should have.  But Walls BBQ is a must.  A must, do you hear?  (Seriously, I'm in favor of any 5 booth eatery where I can't get my pound cake because "I'm sorry, ma'am, it's still in the oven.")

This isn't right?

We got home from that and it was back into the throes of work.  (It should be mentioned that this was my fall break and, enjoyable as conferences can be, you don't rest all that much.)  In addition to my work load of five sizable classes, we were in the final stages of completing the Wanna Cook? draft, including the "bits & pieces" such as the acknowledgements and the source list.  As we're drafting those parts, other parts are coming from Our Intrepid Editor for revisions, and then we also started getting bits from our copy editor for the final fine-tuning.  It gets confusing to turn around that much that fast!  And there was Halloween candy.  And a spa day with Barefoot to celebrate (we both had milestones recently that were best marked with cushy robes and gigantic out-of-season strawberries).

In the last week, I've started making a real effort to get back to my established good habits.  I'm not there yet, but I have a plan.  In the meantime, the book is very nearly finished on our end of things (and hey - we've got a publicist!  I'm not sure what to make of that.) and the past months of good habits meant the house isn't in total disarray.  It's picked up (aside from one "hot spot" on the kitchen counter), but needs a good clean.  We got off-budget this month, but not to the point of using credit cards, so that can easily be corrected this next month.  And I can start carrying a water bottle and using the walking track again.  And FryDaddy and I are inking in some "couple time" that wild mammoths couldn't interrupt.

And I did not go mad.

I'm telling you - that's more of an accomplishment than it may sound.  In the past, I was so tightly locked into the shackles of perfectionism that if I didn't get everything crossed off my list ("Drink 70 oz. of water, check.  Walk at least 30 minutes, check.  Eat 5 fruit/veg, check" and so on), the day was a failure and I was a Bad Person.  To be able to look at the dirty kitchen floor and say, "I'll Swiffer it after work Wednesday" is a HUGE step!

Much work to do, true. But it's worth acknowledging that much work has been done.

Onward!

Savor. Yes, You. Right Now.

Yeah, you have to look closely at the picture to make out the scratched-in letters.  That's sort of the point, though.  Savoring takes time.  Usually, we don't savor very well - we're in too much of a rush.  When you get caught up in deadlines and last-minute "emergencies that aren't" (I'm looking at you, everything to do with information technology upgrades) to the point that you forget to eat, you don't savor the meal that you hastily unwrapped and inhaled.  Sure, you kept from getting so hungry that you made a royal ass out of yourself in the client meeting, but really - you want to count that as a win?

Aim higher.

Look, I know more than I like to admit about failing to find balance between work and life.  I eat too many meals at my desk, I answer too many e-mails when I'm supposed to be at home off the clock, and I fret far too much about things, people, and places over which I have no - zero, nada, zilch, nil - absolutely no control.

So maybe I'm the perfect person to tell you this.

Stop.

Just.  Stop.  Not forever, but just for a few minutes.

In the last few days, I've reached a major milestone in a project that started more than 18 months ago.  It's not done yet, although I think that faint shimmer on the horizon is the finish line, so I can almost see it from here.  This is a project that I am button-bustingly-proud of and it is only right and proper to take some time to savor the accomplishment.  (Seriously - if you wait for the world to crown you, you're likely to be waiting a l-o-n-g time for that sash and tiara.  I'm telling you, go buy your own and call yourself the "Possum Princess" or the "Count of Accounting" or whatever suits your particular fancy.  Don't worry what other people think - mostly, they're jealous that they didn't think of the idea and very few people will say much of anything to someone confident enough to wear a tiara, especially when coupled with a heavy scepter.)

So I've been savoring.  With the help of my intrepid co-author and Savoring Majordomo, FryDaddy, I have or have plans to:

• Take a day off - no work at all on anything.  No checking e-mail, no "just this one thing."  Nuttin'.
• Sleep in on a weekday.
• Eat a deliciously hearty breakfast brunch that would make any decent physician blanch with horror.  But tell me what makes bacon better than warm maple syrup left over from a thickly-buttered waffle.  Exactly.  Nuttin'.
• Read a sword & sorcery novel that is so by-the-numbers that I can predict the ending.  Read to the end anyway.
• Take a nap in the middle of the day with my husband.
• Decorate the house for Halloween.
• Consider the possibilities of pumpkin.
• Have a long phone call with my parents, who have been short-changed during this last writing push.
• Discover new ways to combine coffee and sugar.  (Cortadito, anyone?)
• Spend a day in an undisclosed location with a girlfriend, a stack of glossy magazines, and a licensed esthetician.
• Make dinner from scratch.
• Daydream about teaching the cats the foxtrot.
• Eat an entire pint of really good ice cream in a single sitting.
• Take time.

Above all else, take time.  Look around and be sure you can answer the question, "Why do I do this?"  Sure, sometimes it's simply to pay the bills and keep the wolf from the door; I get that.

But life needs to mean more than that.

Our responsibility is to make sure that it does.

Nine Month Check In!

A few new things to report.  September's been an interesting month, with the Wanna Cook? book project entering overdrive for the final push - by the next check-in, the entire book will have been drafted and the final bits will have been turned in for editing.  Breaking Bad wraps up its broadcast run this Sunday and next week, I have a paper to present on Saul Goodman and legal ethics at a conference (said paper is still - ahem - in a state that can most kindly be described as "rough draft" form.  Saturday's a busy, busy day!).  FryDaddy is also presenting and we both have school/work obligations.  As you can imagine, that's a lot of plates to spin.

This is the very reason why routines matter so much.  By now, housework has (mostly) gotten to a groove - laundry and dishes are caught up and the house is reasonably free of dirt (although pet fur is a constant accent to our decor) and that's a comfort in the busy, busy days that have been September and that will continue for another two weeks or so.  I scaled a few things back this month - I realized I was overdoing it and then beating myself up for not hitting every goal, every day.  A "star" day right now is exercise 30 minutes total (doesn't have to be in one fell swoop at 6:45 in the morning), drink 70 oz. of water, eat 5 servings of fruit/vegetables, limit the junk food (twice a week and only reasonable portions then), and do something positive for my overall mindset (I've discovered short guided meditations just before bed to help my crazywhirly brain settle and unwind from the day).  That's enough, I figure.  I'm a little less stressed, even though I'm in the midst of a very stressful period, so I'm marking this down as a win.

The big change this past month is that FryDaddy and I got serious about a very taboo area - finances.  Like many Americans, we have credit-card debt and were working from a budget that was more of a glorified checkbook balance than an actual plan.  We'd gotten tired of the stress associated with constantly being on a shoestring and we knew that we ought to be doing better - our income is decent and, while I still have a big chunk of debt from law school (and he'll soon have grad school loans to pay - but not undergrad, thankyouthankyouthankyou Mom Squared), we don't have car payments and our mortgage is quite reasonable - but it took us a while to commit to change.

Now we have.  We're just at the beginning, but already, I see a difference.  We've got a budget that tells our money where to go, instead of wondering helplessly where it went.  Any change in the budget (like when I forgot to include a couple of items and when we underestimated the amount we'd need for grocery money) requires us both to sign off on re-jiggering the columns, which still have to zero out so every dollar is accounted for.  We've committed to not using credit and throwing every extra dollar that comes into our paws at our debt.  It won't be short, and it won't be easy, but it's going to be SOOO worth it!  I hesitated to bring this up here (while nearly every American has debt, it's not something I find easy to talk about), but the point of these monthly check-ins is to be honest and accountable and, for me, debt is a dirty little secret.  It feels great to have a plan, instead of just drifting along, hoping that I get lucky with Powerball or some fairy dust hits my retirement account.  (For those interested, we're using the Dave Ramsey "Money Makeover" system.)  Again, it's not a quick fix, but we didn't get into this mess overnight, so it stands to reason that it'll take a while to sort out.  Journeys start with the first step, right?

Right.

Three Month Check In!

Which is the Cadbury one?

Well, I'm about 90 days into my "let's get real about overhauling things" journey and it's time for a monthly summary.  I'm pleased to report that things look much better than they did a month ago.

First up, after the Doldrums of February, I had to get re-committed to my goals.  I did this and yes, I'm back on track. I broke a weight-loss plateau, which was nice, but more importantly, I am able today to look back on a solid month of drinking the amount of water I'm supposed to (just water - I don't count anything else, like my daily coffee fix, or my occasional sodas or tea) and eating at least four servings of fruit/vegetables a day.  (I know that's not enough, but that was my goal and I made it.  In April, I'll shoot for five.)  As silly as it may sound, an app called Plant Nanny is helping with the water aspect of things.  Since mid-March, I've "grown" a pompadoured dandelion and a Devil's Ivy that looks like a very happy celery.  Yesterday, I just started a cactus and I had to give that puppy 24 ounces of water before he stopped sulking this morning.  (Yes, I know how weird that sounds.)

Walking has gotten easier.  I've missed my daily 8,000 steps goal four times this month, but that's okay, too. Remember that I don't take "days off" with that, so every single day I'm trying to fit in those steps.  Some days - whether due to work, play, or just weather (March is changeable indeed!) - it just didn't happen.  Then again, I've made it more a priority, which is especially good on those l-o-n-g office days.  Get up and move - it helps your mind shift gears.

The house - funny story here.  About five years ago, I had my old-school jalousie windows replaced with full glass ones.  I was all about them being far more energy efficient, but when the installer was trying to demonstrate to me how easy they were to clean, because they tilt inwards, I looked at him like he was extolling the virtues of eating buzzard guts.  Wash windows?  Crazy.  Until I gave it a try this month.  I need to call that guy - he's right!  It IS easy, it DOES let in more light, and the whole house looks better!  I'm trying to follow the FlyLady system of "it's good enough and you can do anything for 15 minutes a day" as I declutter and organize the house this year and with window-washing, all I'm doing is washing the windows of one room a week.

By the way, if you're feeling that your house is cluttered, dingy, crowded, and hardly a place of haven from the hurly-burly of the world, RUN, don't walk, to FlyLady.net and click the "Getting Started" tab.  Then shine your sink.  I know, I know.  It sounds silly and irrelevant.  Do it anyway.  I found this system just before the New Year and it's mind-blowing.  It'll take me all year to get it down pat, but I've got the basics and I've decluttered a ton (probably literally) in 90 days and I've got my morning/evening routines in place.  And yes, I work full time.  You can still do this and your house can be a place that welcomes you rather than a place you want to hide from.  15 minutes a day.  Don't try to do it all at once.

In other news:

• Easter is tomorrow!  I have an inexplicable urge to put on a flowered hat and this is an urge I shall obey.
• There's no joyous Easter without the solemnity of Maundy Thursday and (especially) Good Friday.  On Maundy (Holy) Thursday, we are reminded of the call to serve others that is a hallmark of the Christian faith as the pastor humbly washes the feet of a congregant.  (It's a holdover from the Catholic Church and the newly-elected Pope Francis got this one right.  Wow! Jesuits. There may be some serious shaking up of things with this pontiff.)  My religious tradition also involves a Good Friday service that chills me as with each of the readings, the sanctuary gets progressively darker, until the final words "It is finished" are spoken, the Christ candle is extinguished, and the massive book of scripture is slammed shut.  Congregants then disperse in silence, a far cry from the usual chatter that follows my favorite benediction: "Go preach the Gospel.  Use words if necessary."
• My drama class finished their examination of Macbeth by watching Kurosawa's Throne of Blood this week.  Yeah, everybody (and there were a few) who sneered and told me that my students couldn't appreciate/handle a black-and-white film with subtitles and even the ones who thought I should show it for the same reason parents give Brussels sprouts to their kids - they won't like it, but it'll be good for them - can please accept my invitation to go take a running leap into the nearest lake.  They got it, it was valued over the BBC "straight" version they saw last week, and several of them loved it.  That made my day.  It really, really did.
• In scribbling news, a major milestone has been reached in the writing of Wanna Cook? the guide to Breaking Bad that I'm co-writing with Ensley (also known here as FryDaddy).  We have a detailed breakdown of deadlines for the rest, and the whole enchilada is due to be written, edited, polished, and (whew!) handed it for printing in mid-October.  It's going to be a wild six months, but I sincerely believe the bulk is done.  
• It's a gorgeous, early-spring day, I've got a house that's decently in order, a husband who thinks I'm the best decision he's ever made, two cats with distinct personalities, a dog that could make Scrooge smile, more friends than my house can hold, work I enjoy, a weekly movie show, and a book contract.  On top of that, I have a spa day scheduled Monday with two girl friends and next week is spring break.
• It's good to count your blessings and run out of fingers.

Happy Easter to all!