More Light!

Here at the end of the year, holidays galore are celebrated. (This is the origin of the "Happy Holidays" greeting - retailers don't want to risk offending anyone with cashy money. It's not so much a "war on Christmas" as it is "please, come spend!") When you stop amid the hustle-bustle and think about it, it seems that every holiday centers around the concept of Light. This makes astronomical sense, at least for those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, since we've just passed the marker of the winter solstice. Our part of the world is hunkering down for the long, dark nights of winter - perfect for reflection and pondering, but also perfect for the winter blues as our span of daylight is short.

So - Christmas lights, Hanukkah menorahs, Kwanzaa candles, Yule logs - and I'm sure there are many others at this time of year. Bring the light that we're missing from our shortened days inside to our homes and hearths, along with the scent of pine, fir, cedar, mulled cider, fresh-baked bread and sweets - seriously, no wonder we're more inclined to be a touch nicer to each other! (Side note - based on this, yes - we certainly SHOULD try harder to keep this holiday spirit all the year round!)

I'm looking forward to 2017 - some wonderful things are going to happen in this shiny new year. Oh, there will be bumps as well; that's how you know you're moving forward, but it's going to be a good, GOOD year. While I'm tempted to make resolutions galore (pretty much all the usual suspects there), I'm resisting. Well, except for one. In 2017, I want to be kind and find delight in my days. In short, I want to reflect more light.

That's it. But I think it's enough.

I'm a reader and I've collected quite a few books on self-care, decluttering, being the change you want to see in the world, creating an oasis of calm, downshifting, and so on. All have good advice in general, but it's time to get specific. What works for me? What doesn't work for me? In short, how can I put on my own oxygen mask so that I can help others with theirs? I've discovered a number of things that work, and sharing those, along with my efforts to find more, will be the focus of this blog in the next year. I hope you join me for that journey - it's going to be a fun one!

See you in the New Year and - however you celebrate, may this final week of 2016 be what you most delight in!

Looking Forward!

Here it is - the end of 2014. A traditional time to reflect and resolve. I did that this year and - scratch that. What I did was OVERdo that this year! Well, no sense pummeling myself about that. Instead, I've been using that experience as a means to figure out what is to be gleaned from that experience.

Mind you, I had some incredible successes this past year and some wonderful "mountaintop moments," including the publication of Wanna Cook? and seeing FryDaddy complete his graduate studies and come home to live with me and be my love full-time. I reached my goal of competing in a 5K race and, along the way, discovered that I like my version of jobbling. I attended my college reunion and caught up with a number of women who helped form me into the person I turned into. Likewise, I attended the Whedon-based Slayage conference and connected with an amazing circle of scholars who helped shape me professionally. Honestly, it was a very good year in many, many respects.

But the ending needed work. I took on too many challenges, both personally and professionally, and I buckled under the weight of all those obligations. That would have been fine, but I refused to admit that I am not Supergirl and that led to some long, dark nights of the soul. And - oh yeah - cancer diagnosis.* So in some ways it was a pretty lousy year.

Therefore, the key question was what to do, what to do?

Colanders & sloths. It's a thing.

Then I had an epiphany. (Not the Epiphany party I've thrown for years, though. That's one of the things going by the wayside this year as a concession to December's surgery.) I don't want this coming year to be about outside things as much as I want to make it about inside things. Yes, I hope that side effects of that will be a return to healthier habits, but my focus this next year is going to be just on being kinder to myself. As corny as it may sound, the cancer diagnosis, with all its attendant fear, uncertainty, and occasional moments of actual terror, has been a bizarre sort of gift. I've had to slow down. I've had to let others take care of me and no one wanted to hear me apologize for it. I honestly can't list all the kindnesses that have been shown to me during this ordeal, nor can I list all the people who have been so joyous when I had good news to share at different stages of this misadventure.

So - my resolution for 2015 is simple - be kind to myself. Instead of crash dieting and setting checklist and checklist for myself, I want this year to include changes such as:

• Not eating lunch at my desk while I check e-mail every workday
• Eating a lunch that consists of real food, not just a meal shake and a granola bar
• Building breaks into my day instead of having meeting after appointment after conference
• Making time off a requirement instead of a "wow, wouldn't that be nice?" Seriously, religions that observe a Sabbath are on to something in this regard.

Oh, there's plenty more I'd like to do, but it's a very, very good start that will already require me to make some real changes in order for me to put my own well being at the top of the list in ink instead of tentatively writing my name lightly in pencil at the very bottom of the page.

It sounds so simple, but I think it might be harder than it looks.

Onward!


*By the way - surgery was a few days before Christmas, which made for an interesting holiday, but I was so glad to get it done! And - calloo, callay! - the pathology report came back excellentwonderful with a report of clean margins on the excised tissue, which translates into "we got it all." You'll hear more about continued treatment for the next few months (radiation is coming and I doubt it gives me superpowers), but things look good, good, great on that front!

Real Resolutions

It's the final day of 2012 - seems that translation of the Mayan calendar was off a bit - and 2013 looms ahead of us, bright with promise.  I don't claim to have any clue what this new year will bring, but I can tell you what I'm hoping for and working toward.  (Side note:  lots of folks leave off that second part.  No wonder their plans fall apart quicker than a designer bag bought off a truck tailgate.)  There are a few resolutions that seem to be especially popular, so here are the "Big 5" New Year's Resolutions and my reaction to them.

1.  I want to eat better this year.  I solemnly vow that I will no longer kid myself that green apple Now 'n' Laters, despite having the word "green" in the name, count the same as kale.

2.  I want to lose weight this year.  I solemnly vow that I will only consume organic vegetables, free-range meat, fairy dust and free trade club soda.

3.  I want to exercise more this year.  I solemnly vow that I will begin cross-training in the sports of BASE jumping and tiddlywinks.

4.  I want to keep a tidy house this year.  I solemnly vow that I will stop issuing hunting permits for dust bunnies.

5.  I want to travel to the farthest reaches of the known world this year.  I solemnly vow that I will take steps to get my Cleveland County Corn Maze and Knobby Spotting excursion package put together.

Well, it doesn't seem that I'm going to do too well on the "Big 5" resolutions, so what do I expect to accomplish with the upcoming 365 days?

1.  I hope to remember that the small stuff is actually the Big Stuff.
2.  I hope to remember that I impact more people than I know, often when I don't think I'm doing anything worth noticing.
3.  I hope to remember that we all can use a kind word.  Period.
4.  I hope to remember that, when the choice is between screaming like a vengeful banshee and having a frosted cookie, it's okay to have the cookie.
5.  I hope to remember that I feel better when I eat real food, exercise in the sunshine, and take time to ponder things - and that these are not frivolous activities, but are rather sound investments in myself.

May 2013 be good to us all.